Have you ever noticed an elderly loved one talking to themselves and wondered what’s going on?
It’s not as uncommon as you might think.
As people age, they often engage in self-dialogue, a habit that can serve multiple functions, from cognitive support to emotional relief.
This behavior might raise eyebrows or even concerns about their mental well-being. However, talking to oneself is a normal part of aging for many and doesn’t necessarily signal cognitive decline.
In fact, it can be a sign of a healthy mind working to stay active and organized.
Understanding why older adults talk to themselves can help us connect with them better and support their mental health.
Let’s explore some potential reasons for this behavior but, of course, you should discuss any concerns you may have with the person’s physician.
Key Takeaways
- Normal Behavior in the Elderly: Talking to oneself is a common and normal behavior among elderly individuals, aiding in cognitive organization and emotional comfort. It is often seen during problem-solving and as a mechanism to cope with loneliness.
- Signs of Cognitive Health: Self-dialogue can indicate a healthy mind actively working to process thoughts and maintain organization, rather than a sign of cognitive decline.
- Potential Signals for Concern: It is essential to differentiate between normal self-talk and symptoms that may require professional intervention, such as disruptive or incoherent speech, and increased distress during self-dialogue.
- Connection to Dementia: Persistent, newly developed, or altered patterns of talking to oneself in the elderly might suggest the onset of dementia-related cognitive impairment.
- Grieving and Self-Talk: Self-dialogue can be a natural part of the grieving process to stay connected with deceased loved ones. Concern arises only if paired with significant behavioral changes like withdrawal from social activities or persistent sadness.
- When to Seek Help: Consult health professionals if self-talk interferes with daily functioning or social interactions, or if it evolves into speaking with non-existent persons or objects.

When Is Talking to Oneself Considered Normal?
Talking to oneself among the elderly often serves as a cognitive tool and emotional outlet. It’s crucial to recognize when this behavior is typical and when it might suggest a deeper issue.
Recognizing Normal Self-Dialogue
For many older adults, engaging in self-talk is a completely normal behavior that helps manage their daily activities and emotions.
You might find it normal if the self-dialogue:
- Occurs as part of problem-solving or organizing thoughts—Elderly individuals might verbalize lists or steps in a task to better keep track of their actions.
- Provides comfort or reassurance—Talking through past experiences or articulating worries can decrease feelings of loneliness or stress.
- Happens sporadically rather than constantly—Occasional self-talk, especially when facing challenges, is quite regular.
This form of self-communication can increase an individual’s ability to cope with various aspects of aging, thereby maintaining their mental health.
Indications That More Help May Be Needed
However, there are circumstances where talking to oneself might signal it’s time to consult a healthcare professional. Consider seeking advice if the self-talk:
- Interferes with social interactions—When it becomes so frequent that it hinders normal conversations with others.
- Includes disorganized or incoherent speech—If it’s difficult to follow or make sense of the thoughts being expressed.
- Leads to agitation or distress—Signs that talking to oneself is no longer comforting, but rather a source of emotional strain.
Understanding these differences ensures that appropriate support and interventions can be given, enhancing the quality of life for elderly individuals.
By distinguishing between normal and potentially problematic self-talk, you can better support your elderly loved ones or even address your concerns with healthcare providers efficiently.

Signs It’s Time to Be Concerned
The Link Between Self-Talk and Dementia
Dementia represents a variety of conditions characterized by cognitive decline, significantly affecting elderly populations.
Among these, Alzheimer’s disease accounts for 50% to 70% of all dementia cases. Early diagnosis is crucial as it can enhance the quality of life and slow symptom progression, though no cure exists currently.
Other notable causes include vascular dementia, Parkinson’s disease, and frontotemporal dementia. If you notice an increase in self-dialogue among elderly loved ones, understanding its connection to dementia could be vital.
Warning Signs to Watch Out For
Self-dialogue in the elderly may signal cognitive impairment linked to dementia. If you observe the following behaviors, it’s time to be concerned:
- Starting to talk to themselves when they didn’t before.
- Being unaware of their own self-dialogue.
- Speaking to reflections or images as if they are real people.
- Engaging in self-talk even when others are present.
- Behaving as if they are conversing with someone else.
- Exhibiting hallucinations or reactions to invisible entities.
- Experiencing other personality or behavior changes, such as memory issues, irritability, confusion, or shifts in mood.
Is It Related to Grieving?
Talking to oneself can also be a non-pathological response to grief, particularly following the loss of a significant other. In these cases, self-dialogue serves as a bridge to maintain connection with the deceased.
This behavior alone shouldn’t raise concerns if it’s the sole change observed.
However, if accompanied by apathy or a loss of interest in previously enjoyed activities, a health professional’s assessment may be necessary to exclude depression, a common condition in the elderly.

Concluding Thoughts
Self-dialogue isn’t just idle chatter; it’s a complex interplay of memory emotions and coping strategies that can significantly impact the well-being of the elderly.
Recognizing the fine line between normal and concerning self-talk is crucial. If you notice shifts in how your elderly loved ones communicate with themselves especially if these changes accompany other symptoms it’s wise to consult a healthcare professional.
They can provide guidance and potentially diagnose underlying conditions early which is vital for managing diseases like Alzheimer’s effectively.
Remember the power of a simple conversation whether it’s with others or oneself can be profoundly therapeutic.
Keep the lines of communication open and always approach these situations with empathy and understanding.

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What about when the elderly person has become increasingly aggressive and is hostile to anyone who tries to talk about their concerns? It becomes a barrier when trying to help.
Hey Marcus – this is indeed a rough situation. I am not a psychologist but experienced this in my own family. Is there anyone in the family the elderly person will listen to? In my family, my grandmother would listen to my suggestions (whether she would do it or not) but not other members of the family. So, I became the middle man when she needed to be told something. Here are some more tips that could help: https://www.agingcare.com/articles/how-to-handle-an-elderly-parents-bad-behavior-138673.htm
Best of luck in this difficult situation
how about when a elderly talking themselves, thinking that is a person that wanna her money, her dog, her house. everyday put some food to a imaginary person that come every night to pickup, start keep a baseball bat next to her, because she think that is a person that is gonna come to kill her dog or her. or take her money. and she start forget things. like where is the phone, after lost the phone, she say that somebody got the phone, someone stole it, some time she wanna call the police. we should worry about it???
Yes, these are some behaviors I would be concerned about. I discuss this with her doctor as soon as possible.
I’m going through the same thing now with my grandma. An its so scary.
What happens when my mom who is elderly and is active through the day but talk to her self through the night and keeps me up all night? Please I can’t get no help for her, this is new to me .
Hi Dorena – This could be what is called Sundowner’s or Sundowning Syndrome and could be a sign of dementia or Alzheimer’s. Could just be insomnia which many seniors suffer from too. This behavior warrants a visit to her doctor I believe.
I just go on my room and shut the door when my mom gets angry oh and she gets angry and hates everything.then she will talk to herself and ask lots of questions..I think my mom has flipped.she still cooks and drives her little car.but I don’t know what to do..she don’t listen to anything I have to say..so with that she will do what she does..she is a grown women and I’m about to move…I can’t take this..I mean I wasn’t the best son but she knows I wasn’t.so she can be all by herself.I’m gone I can’t live like this.bye mom good luck
My grandfather has been calling my own mother his mother, thinking she is in the house and when my mom says she is not is starting to question her and himself as well. Today he also starting to have a full-on conversation with “her” as if she is in his bedroom (talking to her and then responding like she answered his first thought). Then, when my mother went in the room she said he wanted to cry but didn’t. Can this be a sign he has some degree of Alzheimer’s? If so, which degree is it starting to be?
Hi Ame – based on my personal experience, this is troubling behavior. I think your concerns are justified. I would schedule an appointment with his primary care doctor asap. If you are afraid he won’t go, just make a follow-up appointment and let the nurse know your concerns before you get there so the doctor is “pre-warned” and can help you navigate the situation. Good Luck!
I have noticed recently that my mother in law is talking to someone but there is no one with her so i am not sure if she is talking to herself or thinking out loud. She has hearing aids also. But next time I am going to try listen what she is actually saying to determine what it is she is doing. Will just be observing
My mum started talking to herself about a year ago and is doing it more and more. She talks about me like I am not there ( in an irritable tone). She has been deaf in one ear for a year and suffers back and hip pain severely on a daily basis. Mum is on lots of meds daily which include morphine. The talking is constant and I find that I look forward to when she goes out so I can have peace.
Does this sound like something to worry about?
Chrissy
Hi Christa – From my own personal family experiences, morphine will often make people exhibit behaviors like this. I would discuss this with her physician to be safe though. There are definitely some concerning behaviors especially if these are “new” behaviors.
When my mom was diagnosed with a terminal illness, my dad started to talk to himself but it’s only after my mom passed away early last year, he has been talking to himself more frequently. Once he seemed to realize I’m somewhere within the vicinity, he stopped. He is also beginning to suffer some hearing problems and experiencing forgetfulness. I have yet to take any action on these issues. I’m unsure of how to approach him to tell him about them. Thanks!
Hi! I certainly think that my mother has a problem talking to herself and it bothers me. I cannot put up with it. She can talk to herself for hours she will mumble out loud so I can her like I’m not there. Like we will argue after having a conversation about something that she doesn’t agree with. If she’s upset about something I said she will continue on with the conversation to her own self. . A it’s disturbing to me because it’s things she brings up about the past ten or twenty years ago. She wants to argue about that. I tell her nobody wants to her this stuff everyday about ten years ago. She will talk for hours and hours non stop. What does this mean?
My mom has recently started to talk very loud when she takes bath. She always has a habit to murmur to herself. But talking in the bathroom has become very loud and she is scolding someone. What does this mean?
My father has started talking to himself of late. Earlier my mother used to self talk. I lost my mother 4 years back. I am concerned about my father currently. I will talk to his doctor. Due to the covid situation it is becoming difficult to take him out for consultation. I am not sure whether tele medicines will work out or not. But what I found assuring from the posts is that self talking happens in other households too.
HI I have noticed a change in my mom for weeks now, Occasionally she would talk to herself but I walked in on her and she was having a full conversation I think directed to me. She just sits in her apartment all day. She lives in a senior apartment building but has withdrawn from going to Coffee Gatherings every Friday, not doing her laundry, – I told the doctor all of this and went for blood work and urinalysis and everthing came back normal- Next is an MRI
I’m going threw this also is there anyway to stop this . Keeps me up all night.
My sister-in-law talks to herself non-stop! She recently started living with us. This is the most challenging thing having her here. She seems to have serious cognitive decline, her eye sight seems to be off, she can’t feed herself, her depth perception is off, and her walking is declining. And she will repeat words and incorporate them in one of her conversations.